30 Ways to Improve Sportsmanship in Youth Sports

Youth Sports have been taking a bad rap for a decline in sportsmanship over the last few years. It seems that parents, coaches, and kids have all contributed to some of the problems with sportsmanship in youth sports. As a coach and being around youth sports, I’ve seen behaviors that just shouldn’t be happening around these events.

Youth sports should be a fun experience for everyone involved, both participants of the game and those cheering their kids on. I’d like to highlight 30 ways that parents, coaches, and kids can all help keep sportsmanship on the forefront of the youth sports experience.

For Parents

1. Treat Officials with Respect- Officials aren’t out to get your kids, they aren’t out to sabotage the game, believe it or not, they really just want to officiate a game. Officials make mistakes, like we all do, and we can channel our energy into being a positive cheer leader for our kids and those playing the game, instead of berating the officials for every missed call.

2. Treat Coaches with Respect- Thinking that you know more than the coach or trying to coach the team from the sidelines is not productive. It’s confusing for the kids and undermines the coach. Coaches are doing their best to teach the game, utilize tactical strategies, treat players fairly, and are practicing throughout the week, so they probably have a better grasp on things than you may think.

3. Encourage all the kids- Yes, you want your child to do well and should be cheering your child on, but they are part of team. Being a good sport is being supportive of one another, so cheering for others on the team is something that parents should do.

4. Role Model- If we want our kids to display positive behavior and good sportsmanship, than showing that we are doing the same will encourage our kids to follow our lead.

5. Blaming Others- Our kids will make mistakes during the course of the game, accepting that and helping our kids learn from those mistakes will benefit them. As parents, blaming everyone else doesn’t allow for progress to occur and just causing contention.

6. Boasting- It’s ok to take pride in our kids. We should be proud of our their accomplishment. Let’s ensure that we are doing so in the right way. Nobody wants to go to a game and hear a parent just bragging about their kid the entire game.

7. Examine Expectations– As parents we have good intentions for our kids, but sometimes our expectations can be a little over the top. Before your kids get involved in a sport, think about what you want them to get from playing that sport. If your expectations are clear beforehand, it can help alleviate the possibility of reacting in a negative display of sportsmanship.

8. Carry Yourself well in the stands– This goes along with being a role model. Whether you realize it or not, other people are watching you, including your kids. Do you want to present as that one parent that can’t keep it under control? Pay attention to your body language, what are you projecting?

9. Positive Attitude– Go to games with a positive mindset-that you are there to be a support to the team. Have good thoughts about your child’s performance and of those around you. A positive attitude while help lead to positive action.

10. Treat Opposing Fans with Respect– If we want our kids to show sportsmanship to the opponents, it’s up to us to role model this behaviors as parents. I’ve been to those games where arguments break out amongst parents in the stands or constant jawing from one section to another occurs deterring from what is actually going on in the game. It’s ugly and just has no business in youth sports.

11. Talk about sportsmanship– As parents, if we don’t communicate with our kids about things that matter, than we leave it up to them to figure it out. Having conversations about sportsmanship, why it’s important, and how to display good sportsmanship, will help our kids know the expectations. There are so many examples in the media of stories of both good and bad displays of sportsmanship that you could review with your kids.

12. Be Sober– This seems like something that goes without saying, but I’ve been to youth sporting events where this hasn’t always been the case. Many sporting events promote drinking with things like tail-gating or it just being sold at the event, but cheering your kids on at a youth sports event isn’t the best time for it. Drinking can lead to irrational decisions that don’t need to happen at a youth sports game.

13. Create a Learning Experience– Youth sports is another vessel to teach life lessons to your kids. Helping them learn to overcome challenges, temporary defeat, handle success, treat others the right way, and respect the game are all some of the lessons that parents can teach.

14. Shower with Praise– Build your child up by praising what they are able to accomplish. Praise things like effort and how they contributed to the team. Praise how the conduct themselves with others. Praise when they lift up another teammate. Praise when they respect an official or coach.

15. In the end, it’s just a game– I know that it gets intense cheering for someone that you really care about, but it’s important to keep in mind that it is just a game. Sports tend to be portrayed as a war or battle, but it’s a game, not life or death.

Coaches and Kids

16. Respect the Officials– As a coach, I’ve never been a big believer in yelling and screaming at an official. I’ve definitely had moments where I’ve lost my cool, but have tried to communicate with the refs in a positive manner. It almost seems like it is expected in sports and glorified for the coach to get into a huge tirade with an official at least once in a game. In my opinion, it just shows a lack of emotional control from the coach that’s being demonstrated to the players. It’s one thing to do it in professional sports, but it doesn’t really have any place in youth sports. The refs are out there trying to do the best they can to ensure that the rules are being implemented, they make mistakes, we all make mistakes.

17. Follow the Coach– Kids may get upset when they are removed from the game for various reasons or disagree with the coach’s strategy for the game, but kids can show sportsmanship by communicating the right way with the coach. I have a post on being benched that goes into this topic in more depth.

18. Compete with class– There is a way to compete at a high level without degrading the opponent. If you are doing things to taunt an opponent after a successful play, it’s belittling. Sports is about celebrating competition, not making others feel less of themselves.

19. Shake Hands– We’ve seen a lot more of this in professional sports, where a game was heated, so there was a refusal to shake hands afterwards. I understand this, it can be painful to lose when you are pouring so much into the game. In youth sports, shaking hands helps kids to understand that everyone matters and that you can feel good about giving your best effort.

20. Responding well to a loss– It can be hard when you give your all to something and fall short, but there are ways to handle it in a positive manner. Pouting, showing a negative attitude towards your opponent, or making excuses creates a losing mentality.

21. Be a winner– We all want to win and it can feel exhilarating to win. There can be a wrong way to win. Showboating, rubbing it in to your opponents face, or putting an opponent down is not a true winner. A winner will celebrate with his team after paying respect to his opponent. I enjoy hearing coaches praise their opponent in a press conference after a big win.

22. Enjoy the Experience– Youth sports should be all about fun. If kids aren’t enjoying sports at the younger levels, why would they have any interest in playing the sport in the future? Youth sports should be about providing an experience that can be enjoyable and help kids develop.

23. Follow the Rules– It can be tempting to bend the rules, especially if an opponent is doing it, but maintaining your integrity is more important. Cheating will eventually catch up to you and kids will feel a lot better about themselves knowing that they earned everything they accomplished. With that being said, it’s important for coaches to teach the rules of the sport and be committed to playing within the rules themselves.

24. Do your best– Being a competitor shows sportsmanship by bringing out the best efforts of everyone involved.

25. Stop when the whistle blows– Not much good happens after the whistle blows. It seems that emotions can spill over and lead to an extra exchange that just didn’t need to happen. Just learning to stop will prevent unnecessary outbursts.

26. Role model– Just like parents, coaches are another influence in the lives of their young athletes. Will it be to model positive or negative behavior? I believe a good coach is someone that practices what they preach and doesn’t ask anything more from their players then they would expect from themselves.

27. Ignore the crowd– Sometimes things can be said that can be taken offensively from the crowd towards players. Work on being the bigger person and being able to let things like that go.

28. Use clean language– Foul language just doesn’t need to occur in youth sports. Again, it shows a lack of emotional control and everyone doesn’t want to hear it. It’s even more unacceptable when directed at someone.

29. Treat the playing field with dignity– Whether on a grass surface or hardwood court show respect for the gym or field by keeping it clean. There are people that have to stay after games late at night to clean up, so making their lives a little better by throwing your water cup away or spitting your gum in the trash is a great way to show sportsmanship.

30. Play within the team– Having good sportsmanship comes from playing together as a team. Kids can learn how to fulfill roles on a team or how to share the spotlight which encourages sportsmanship. Nobody wants to play with a ball hog or someone that tries to do everything on their own.

With a little bit of effort, we as coaches and parents can help our kids to continue to display sportsmanship that will create a fun experience for everyone.

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